i’ve got nothin else to say

i’ve got nothin else to say
nothin else to be
all i can do is bow
and do my usual plea

there’re things no one can answer
questions inside of u like cancer
theres only one way u can turn
for everything inside of u that burns
others and i are living proof
it was prayer that made us move
and stir whatever it was inside
that made the gates collide
and shatter down our eyes
as mercy poured during sunrise
and out of the ground grew life
this is what we earned from our strife

i’ve got nothin else to say
nothin else to be
all i can do is bow
and make my usual plea
pray for u, for u like me
to have the mercy
the mercy of the tree

Dedicated to someone. 

i’m not allowed to ask

im not allowed to ask
so i whisper it into her ear
“y do u have to be here?”
n im not allowed to ask
but i dont understand wat she says
n y i get knocked into a blaze…
n i have to burn for her sins
to light that fire when its dim
so she can see me
even tho i never get past her eyes
n all i want is to be
far away from all of her lies
the ones she told me all her life
n i could do nothin but try
n make up for the things she did
the gambles in which she bid
comin closer to sellin her soul
thinkin she was bein bold
n i ran for it every time
bringing it back from the grime
n it happens i was the angel
dyin for her in her Hell
she called it sacrifice
i called it massacre
she would roll the dice
n i saved her from her daggers
so i know i cant help but ask
“y cant u live without bein hurt?”

if only you could hear the pain that my ears feel…

if only you could hear the pain that my ears feel…

the stinging of skin against skin
the thrashing onto cold floors
the suffocation of lungs
the self-abuse of my sister

ONLY for this she’d pull up to her feet
it all started with jus one Beat
n soon she found she could cheat
herself out of her life
forget sister, daughter, wife
when she could be a dead woman
never have to understand
why she was born into Hell
but thas exactly where SHE fell
with the strings ringin in the streets
the drumsticks dancin in their Beats
the people movin their heads to the music
and makin their hearts go sick…

thas wat she did to begin all this
make it all understand her pain
which she fed into her heart
shes sick on the cold floor dying
Beating going on in her mind…
did enough notes sing to her,
“La ilaha il Allah”?

i thought i could stop hating you

i thought i could stop hating you
when i said “inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji3oon”
i wonder what happened when your soul got dragged out,
i wonder with how much pain it went,
you know, for a moment i prayed for you,
that moment of remember Allah and His Power,
that moment where i remembered that would happen to me some day.
and then that moment disappeared, leaving my mind, invisible in the air.
cuz then i saw how you made my love cry,
the agony you caused still in a ricochet of several hearts.
you oppressor…
i have nothing else to waste my breath on,
except this:
may Allah, the Exalted, the Most Powerful, the Just, the Most Merciful, the Owner of all that is in the Heavens and the earth, your Creator, the One to decide upon your fate, may He forgive you.a

devils never abandon the sick

devils never abandon the sick
they stay by their side
waitin for the slip
not to watch em die
but to BRING em to their finality
they fight in their frailty
n i lay there in my intoxication
wonderin if im still in this Nation
my sins n tears, like oil n water
nothin mixes together
nothin fixes these matters
i let jinxes do the batter
oh God make em leave
why cant i jus be
they wont stop screaming
i cant start dreaming
my tears are streaming
n all the light beaming
keeps on missin ME

cuz that’s the way you spin the world

cuz thats the way u spin the world. u cant take the circles and u hurl. it wasnt fair, never fair cuz we’re the little children who just wanted the juice and crackers … u make us step out of the sandbox and go explore n get attacked by the Mind-Hacker.

theres no cure except one, but it comes so longs a way away that we curl up and try to be like little children again. we try to get away from people like u but we know its so wrong, so what then…

we turn our heads down and walk like the imprisoned that we are, the slave babies whose cries no one hears. we hold our heads down even though we shouldnt cuz we’re stronger but we do anyway, just to hide the tears……………….. not for u.

have you ever felt cancer growing at your side?

have you ever felt cancer growing at your side? breaths being taken away, being replaced by pain? knowing your thoughts and feelings couldn’t do justice to what was happening? locking yourself into eyes you’re afraid to look away from? being taken thousands of miles away from the most loved loneliness? and praying in your own sickness to make up for the breaths being lost?

i can imagine your cold face on the ground

i can imagine your cold face on the ground
ending up like everyone else around
broke that pact you and i had
bet you didnt know it was gonna get this bad

i hadda hold hands tryina get through
and others held mine, makin ‘em blue
didn’t know it’d be so worth losin that flesh
didnt know with you i was so blessed

now i gotta stare at your eyelids i close
go to your grave, cant even put down a rose
cant believe i hadda fail like this again
i told myself i wouldnt when this began

… and then i open my eyes and u sit there smiling
and i have to turn away so u dont see me crying
it feels like a dream to have you here and okay
may Allah never… never lead you astray

i had one and regret

i had one and regret
i had another to forget
i closed my eyes
and they were dead
they left with things unsaid
from the day we met
those secret tears we shed,
but knew of eachother’s all along
never asked eachother for so long
u couldnt stop any of my wrong
i couldnt face u to tell me so
but i wanted to, i did know
i couldnt take the whole blow
dont know why i didnt show
i think my very bones need to break
to give this back a shake
or else i dont know how to re-make
i only want it for Allah’s sake

and the sins bombard

and the sins bombard, like piercing glass shards, with no way to block it off, shayTaan stands and scoffs, you screaming in terror, this was all supposed to be fairer, you were good so you get shot, you smiled so you get caught, you wanted what was best, so you get thrown a test, it’s just too much to handle, you’re left with excuses to befuddle, just shut me up and throw me out, i don’t have ears in which to shout, i can’t spend life being kneed, trying to smile everytime i bleed, fine don’t give me peace, just let me die in one piece.